Thorpe Park
Surrey, England

There was a time when Thorpe Park was nothing more than a joke among coaster enthusiasts. Run by the Ready Mix Concrete company (RMC), who had previously mined the site to exhaustion, the park had very little to offer its visitors. If you wanted to stay dry, there was next to nothing you could do all day, as the only two major rides were the "Thunder River" rapids, and "Logger's Leap" Log Flume. The only other ride worth mentioning was "Space Station Zero", an enclosed powered coaster, later brought out into the open and re-themed as "The Flying Fish".

One day, the RMC board decided that it was time to invest in an attraction that would put Thorpe Park firmly on the map. They duly opened the hilariously awful "X:\NoWayOut". The fact that this ride was so comically misjudged meant that it became pretty much the final nail in RMC's coffin.

The park was eventually sold to the Tussaud's Group, owners of Alton Towers, and the nearby Chessington World of Adventures. Possibly unsure of how to run two parks so close together, Tussaud's initially seemed happy to carry on where RMC left off, albeit on a grander scale. Tussaud's first major installation came in 2000 with Tidal Wave, the extremely wet OD Hopkins Shoot-the-Chute ride. Although an excellent ride, it was hardly going to reverse Thorpe's image as just a glorified water park.

2000 was not a season to remember fondly, with a major fire destroying some of RMC's original dark rides. In a bid to boost the park's ride count, a portable Huss Enterprise was hastily brought in to fill the gap. The following year, the Enterprise was re-themed, re-named "Zodiac", and (rather cheekily) advertised as a new ride.

2001 saw the park move in the right direction. In addition to Zodiac, Tussaud's also added "Vortex", the first park-model Afterburner from KMG, and "Detonator", the surprisingly good Fabbri freefall tower. Admittedly, this move was not an immediate success, and soon the park found itself on BBC1's "Watchdog" after visitors complained that after promising three new rides, Zodiac was almost permanently closed, Detonator opening intermittently, and Vortex existing merely as a hole in the ground until mid-season. Although none of these problems were the fault of the park, it did set the regeneration off on the wrong foot.

Twelve months later, the park's fortunes were on the up. Finally, the park had a truly world class ride to attract the punters - Colossus, the world's first 10-inversion coaster. Colossus fulfilled everything the park could ask of it. Not only is it a great ride, it looks stunning, and makes a perfect signature ride for the park, with a look and feel that distinguishes it from any of the UK's other coasters.

Colossus only had one season as the star attraction, as 2002 saw the arrival of Nemesis Inferno, the curiously named B&M inverted coaster built partly on the site of the destroyed dark rides. With Alton Towers’ original Nemesis being famous as one of the greatest steel coasters in the world, Inferno had a tough act to follow, and wisely the ride was designed not to be too similar to the original, giving it a character and feel of its own. In a very smart move, the park also added two low-key support rides to soak up some of the extra crowds the coasters would attract - "Quantum" and "Eclipse", a Flying Carpet and Ferris Wheel respectively.

With two high-quality steel coasters and a good range of support rides, Thorpe Park could finally hold its own against the competition, and call itself a major player in the UK theme park market. It has certainly been a very rapid transformation, and begs the question: Is it really possible that in a few seasons, Thorpe Park can go from a laughing stock to a genuine challenger to the "big name" parks like Alton Towers and Blackpool Pleasure Beach? It's certainly a tough task, but let's see what a visit to the new-style Thorpe Park has to offer. 

First things first: Thorpe Park is very accessible, being very close to the M25 motorway, but the journey is not entirely straightforward. Your map will show it as being right next to Junction 12 of the M25, but you can't actually get to the park from there - Goodness knows how many people have got lost trying! From the north, the park is just 10 minutes from the motorway, and is fairly well signposted from Junction 13, although the confusing road layout may make you doubt the directions they give. The car park is straightforward, free, and right next to the park entrance - no need to waste time catching monorails before you are allowed in, for example!

Southerners use junction 11 which is conveniently placed just before one of the M25’s many bottle necks. A poorly signposted 10-minute journey will follow, consisting of a mixture of dual-carriageways and 30mph speed limited roads.

Like many other parks (Drayton Manor, The American Adventure), Thorpe Park uses a lake as its main feature. Where Thorpe differs is that the park is in the middle of the lake, not the other way around. While this is unusual, it has its benefits. For example, it allows the park to have the most fabulous entrance I've encountered. While most parks usher visitors through their equivalents of Disney's Main Street, Thorpe's visitors pass through the turnstile and out onto a quite majestic bridge, offering views of almost all of the major rides. From left to right you catch a glimpse of Vortex, Zodiac, Quantum, Eclipse Colossus, Nemesis Inferno, Detonator, and Tidal Wave, and Depth Charge all in one go. This really is a wonderful way to start your day, and really gives a sense of crossing over into somewhere special, detached from the everyday world.

At the other end of the bridge sits Atlantis, the dome that fulfils all the functions of places like Main Street, with its various little shops and cafes. Atlantis was designed to act as the hub of the park, although later developments have lessened that effect. From Atlantis, the most obvious place to start your tour of the park is Lost City, on the left had side as you enter the park.

Lost City comprises of five main rides. Vortex, Zodiac, Quantum, Eclipse and Colossus. Theming is not excessive, and is largely based around the idea of navigation. Overall, the impression is that Lost City ought to be split into two areas, as Colossus seems very self-contained. The rest of Lost City has a fairground feel to it, being full of the kind of rides you might find at a good fair. Vortex should get a special mention as probably the best theme-park spinning ride in the UK. Although nowhere near as intense as its travelling equivalent, it gives a highly enjoyable ride, lasting long enough to make it worth queuing for.

Technically part of Lost City is X:\No Way Out. Relieved of the burden of expectation that came from being the park's biggest ride, this has become something of a cult classic, and is hilariously entertaining in its own surreal way. That said, it still sticks out like a sore thumb in comparison to its surroundings, and the juxtaposition between it and Colossus serves only to remind visitors that Thorpe Park is very much a mixture of the older RMC installations and the far more polished work of Tussaud's.

For more examples of the RMC philosophy, look no further than Loggers Leap. Although a fun ride, it simply sits at the end of a cul-de-sac, and offers spectators little chance to be involved with the ride. The queue, far from a sprawling ramble through the ride's scenery, is a truly hideous cattle grid stretching off into the distance. The ride itself is good fun, and probably RMC's best installation, taking riders off into an otherwise inaccessible part of the park, before ending with a nice double-drop.

Another RMC leftover, Depth Charge, looks hideously out of place. Four large blue water slides taken in inflatable boats may have looked impressive in the overgrown playground that was RMC's Thorpe Park, but does little to enhance Thorpe's bid to become a serious contender for Britain's top theme park. Similarly, RMC's Model Village, featuring scale models of the Eiffel Tower, CN Tower and Pyramids sticks out as a real relic of the old park, and is ripe for redevelopment.

At the other end of the scale, Tidal Wave has Tussaud's signature all over it. With quirky theming, and masses of opportunity to keep non-riders entertained, the ride is pure comedy. The wave generated as each boat hits the water is unbelievable, and stretches just far enough to hit unsuspecting passers by, with hilarious consequences. As a result, the Amity Cove generates a great atmosphere, helped by a WWTP - a mock radio station that constantly churns out the anthems of 50s Americana.

Sadly, not all of Tussaud's work has been for the better. The bland but inoffensive Intamin rapids ride, Thunder River, was transformed in 2002 into Ribena Rumba Rapids. This travesty of a re-theme involved painting everything in colours that would make the Dulux dog wretch, and adding a set of dreadful animatronic Ribena berries to the tunnel. The blatant in-ride advertising is spookily reminiscent of The Simpsons' "Duff Gardens". Oh yes, just to add insult to injury, the perfectly good 6 seat boats were replaced by dreadful boats that theoretically hold 8 people, provided they adopt a series of yoga positions that allow them to fit their legs in.

As for support rides, these are mostly from the RMC camp. Rides like "Mr Monkey's Banana Ride" sit in the strange category of being too big to call a kiddie ride, and to small to call an adult ride. Whatever it is, it is worth riding just to hear the staff announce "Be careful when you climb off the banana". Mr Monkey, by the way, is one of the "Thorpe Park Rangers", a series of costume characters that RMC wrongly thought would boost the park's image. Other support rides include the Flying Fish powered coaster, a highly entertaining incarnation of Mack's off-the-shelf Runaway Mine Train, very nicely landscaped. The ride is surprisingly rapid in places, and would make a nice addition to the park if only the queue weren't so mind-numbingly dull.     Even the catering arrangements show signs of the park's dual influences. While sister parks Alton Towers and Chessington have McDonald's restaurants dotted around, RMC's long standing contract with Burger King means that you'll find no Golden Arches at Thorpe (actually, that's one thing for which RMC deserve our thanks). At the centre of the park, a nicely themed branch of KFC shows signs of having been caught up in the devastating Tidal Wave that hits the unfortunate Amity Cove every two minutes, while the rest of the park is served by a selection of own-brand fast food outlets.

With regard to shows, the main two are Pirates 4D and the Spiderman stunt show. At its most basic level, Pirates 4D is a 3D cinema, the 4th "D" being a variety of in-theatre effects synchronised with the film. For example, a pirate falls in water, climbs out, spits out a stream of water, water sprinkles onto the audience. The film is let down partly by the misuse of the 3D effect (the effect is superb during the computer-generated intro is superb, but not during the actual film), and partly by the dismal film, which sees Leslie Neilson doing exactly what always does, only to a lower standard, while Eric Idle pops up just to confirm that he hasn't been funny since for two decades - in case there's any doubt, he does a comedy French accent throughout.

Spiderman doesn’t do much to raise the standard. Our slick superhero is reduced to a bumbling lycra-clad Chuckle Brother chasing after an odd breed of street dancing bandits terrorising the city with poor singing.

Compared to Alton Towers, it is obvious that there are certain differences in the way the park is run. Thorpe's staff are infinitely more pleasant than Alton's, and actually seem to care about making your day enjoyable. As someone more used to Alton than Thorpe, I have been stunned to hear staff say things like "Good morning", "Is that restraint comfortable, sir?" and "Did you enjoy the ride?". Thorpe seems to have remembered that when they've spent £10 million on a new coaster, it will still be far more enjoyable for the customers if the staff create a pleasant atmosphere in which to ride it.

One thing that helps Thorpe immensely is its use of music. While many parks reserve music only for dark rides, with all others operating in a deathly silence, Thorpe manages to maintain a good atmosphere by adding quality soundtracks to rides like Vortex and Detonator. Believe me, once that Detonator soundtrack is in your head, it will be there for a long long time...

In terms of theming, it is good that Thorpe has avoided cloning Alton Towers' style. Even Nemesis Inferno avoids the temptation to copy the sense of extreme darkness and intimidation that made the original Nemesis famous. Everything at Thorpe has a sense of fun and almost cartoon-like jollity about it, which will no doubt come as a relief to those who dislike Alton's more industrial feel.

Ticket prices are similar to other Tussaud's parks. Three price bands exist, the prices going up depending on how busy the park is likely to be. While it makes sense to encourage people to visit on quieter days, it is frustrating to turn up and find you are being charged more to visit on a day when you will not have time for so many rides.

Fortunately, regular visitors and skinflints (I like to think of myself as both) will be delighted with the season pass option, which allowing unlimited visits to all Tussaud's attractions. Given the number of attractions covered (Alton Towers, Chessington, Tussaud's Waxworks, Warwick Castle), the pass offers phenomenal value for money. Not only that, Thorpe is particularly generous with regards to offering special events for season pass holders, such as celebrating the launches of Colossus and Nemesis Inferno by holding their exclusive "Premiere Screaming" events.

Thorpe's season is the standard March/April to October/November. There is, however, an unusual tendency to close the park for the occasional day or two during the season. I certainly wouldn't expect this from a major park, and can only imagine the frustration of turning up after a long drive only to find the park closed. As is becoming customary, the park ends its season with a Guy Fawkes Night celebration, featuring a firework show not dissimilar to Alton Towers.

Fright Nights really hit the spot, even if you’re not into Halloween. Freezer, a fairly intense walkthrough maze is accompanied by 3D Freakshow, a mesmerising walk through with more palatable frights.

Although Thorpe is becoming a very good place to visit, there are one or two areas in which it still feels to be struggling to cope with its newfound status as a major park. Firstly, ride reliability is proving a problem. It is not usual, it seems, to visit the park and find a handful of rides closed for at least part of the day. Secondly, there appears to have been a naivety as to the type of visitors that major rides can attract, resulting in Colossus and particularly Nemesis Inferno opening with queue lines that made queue jumping all too easy. Hopefully, these are just symptoms of growing pains brought on by the park's graduation into the big league.

Thorpe Park has come an awful long way in the last few years. From a children's' playground masquerading as a theme park, to a real contender for the title of Britain's best theme park. With a prime position near London, and plenty of space the park always had great potential, and is finally beginning to blossom. With only Blackpool Pleasure Beach offering a wider selection of high quality rides, Thorpe Park is now very worthy of being regarded as one of the UK's top parks. Whether it will challenge the public’s overblown perception of Alton Towers as the king of British theme parks, time will tell. It certainly deserves to.

Why then only 4 stars? Well, there are the odd little annoyances that sometimes give the impression that the park is struggling slightly to come to terms with its recent elevation in status. Despite this, the signs are most certainly there that before very long, Thorpe Park could become the best theme park in the country.

John Phillips