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R is for... Reign of the Rodent
Screamin’ Squirrel, Gardaland

Ever wanted to know what it must have been like for Thelma and Louise to drive their 1956 Thunderbird off the edge of a cliff without the obvious bother of making insurance claims and side effects including dizzy spells and – well – death?

Well, wonder no more my foolhardy readers, as Stan Checketts may have the perfect prescription to remedy your curiosity.

The simplest way to describe Screamin’ Squirrel is for you to imagine a Wild Mouse, but flipped on its side. Your four-person car climbs the lift to the top, and runs along the top of this track. Each hairpin bend flips the car through a downward turn and into a long stretch of inverted track.

At the end of this extraordinary stretch of completely upside-down track, your car would curl through another hairpin bend and return to an upright position only to make the same manoeuvre again.

And again. And again.

The word 'hairpin' seems strangely appropriate in this photo.  Picture: Screamscape/Lance Hart

A select few people have already ridden the Screamin’ Squirrel at S&S’s Utah factory and the ride has initially got a resounding thumbs up. Gardaland’s will be a custom design and is the first installation outside the S&S factory.

To be honest, little is known about the yet-unnamed ride. It is thought it will be larger than the 90ft version that S&S were previewing and will include the same style four-seater cars using lap bars as the predominant restraint and overhead shoulder restraints to support your upper body. These restraints have already been used on Fantasy Island’s Absolutely Insane, and will also be on Thorpe Park’s Slammer.

J is for... Sky Swat & Screamin' Swing
S&S at Thorpe Park

After a relatively quiet year last year, Thorpe Park will be adding two more Europe-first rides to their impressive arsenal of chunder challengers.

We’ve come a long way since Fabbri, it seems, with American manufacturer S&S Power being the manufacturer of choice for Slammer (Sky Swat) and Rush (Screamin’ Swing).

Slammer fills the gap between Colossus and X:\ No Way Out and uses S&S’s fandangled air technology to raise a double-ended spatula seating 64 people up to a height of 65 feet before rotating the whole shebang around in large 105ft arcs.

Personally, it sounds fairly hum-drum, but for a spin ride has a lot of weight in terms of marketing (Slammer is only the second version in the world) and, let’s face it, will look absolutely amazing.

Replacing Eclipse, meanwhile, is Rush. Rush is like a giant swing, but instead of a loving parent or guardian to push you up beyond 90-degrees, it again puts S&S’s prowess with air to good use.

While the park claim this is the first version in the world, Knott’s Berry Farm opened their version a few months ago to good reviews. Thorpe’s version will be the biggest so far seating 32 people per ride.

Slammer is due to open with the park, while Rush is scheduled to open a bit later in the season.  

T is for... Tang’Or the Topple Tower
Tang'Or, Walibi Lorraine

Star Parks were obviously impressed by the concept of Huss’ Topple Tower, as Tang’Or is the second version of the ride that they have committed themselves to this year.

Like Bellewaerde’s, Tang’Or will be a bird-themed family spin ride, rocking 40 people to and fro as the ride turns within a circle of fountains.

This €2 million investment follows on from the change of ownership from Six Flags to Star Parks, a new European consortium that also own Walibi World and Walibi Belgium.

And despite the slow economy with regards to theme parks in Europe, Wallibi Lorraine have announced that to accommodate their family audience, admission prices will be dropping for 2005 from nearly €22 to €19 while children’s admission drops by 75c.

U is for... Underwater Underwear
Sponge Bob SquarePants 4D, Ice Age and Timekeepers, Movie Park

Given the choice, it’s no real surprise that out of all the sponges in the world who wear square pants, Sponge Bob Square Pants was the obvious choice to headline the hat trick of new attractions planned for newly re-named Movie Park.

Bikini Bottom's most famous resident, Sponge Bob Square Pants and friends

The famous gap-toothed Bikini Bottom resident takes an audience of two hundred in the newly refurbished Roxy Theatre on a multi-sensory journey of underwater capers and high jinks as you watch Sponge Bob and friends in the wonders of 4D.

SimEX Iwerks are behind the show, which has a starring cast of Sponge Bob, vibrating seats and water, as well as high definition 3D projections and state of the art technology. Should you doubt the abilities of SimEX Iwerks, their customer portfolio includes customers such as Port Aventura (Sea Odyssey), Universal Studios (Shrek 4D) and was behind Batman The Ride which coincidentally also leaves the park to be replaced by Timekeepers.

Timekeepers is an Attraction Media and Entertainment Inc simulator using a simple, if predictable pretext of being taken through time by madcap inventor, Horace Garrison.

In the third attraction Thinkwell Industries are revamping Loony Toons Adventure and giving residence to Scrat the Squirrel, Sid the Sloth and Manny the Mammoth; stars of the hit animated film, Ice Age.

J is for... Va Va Voom
Rita - Queen of Speed, Alton Towers

If there’s one thing guaranteed to get a pre-pubescent enthusiast hot and sweaty under the collar, it’s the prospect of a new coaster at Alton Towers. Throw a latex-clad lady with more curves than a Monaco race circuit, and you have the self-proclaimed Queen of Speed herself, Rita... and a lot of excited enthusiasts.

The name “Rita – Queen of Speed” may have been intended to follow the hot-rod tradition of giving cars female names, but that doesn’t alter the fact that it will seem a truly bizarre name to the 99% of visitors that won’t know that. Nor does it make it any easier to contemplate standing in a long queue, listening to people using the name to come up with atrociously contrived double-entendres. Just be assured that you won’t be finding any such smut here, oh my goodness no.

Check out Rita's curves. The coaster might be worth checking out too.

Far be it from me to shatter the illusions of her drooling fans, but Rita is a roller coaster, and as yet, it is impossible to say whether a few minutes in her embrace will be enough to put you to sleep, or whether she’ll be a jolly good ride and get your juices flowing. Early indications, however, are optimistic. Indeed, it could prove to be an ideal ride for the park, which has always previously needed to go to extreme measures to circumvent the local authorities’ severe restrictions regarding ride height. Whereas other rocket coasters propel their riders up and over Intamin’s huge trademark arches, Rita’s launch leads to a more traditional figure-of-8 layout, full of promising looking sweeps and helices, with the added bonus of the so-called "EGF turn" element that proved so popular on Expedition Ge-Force and Goliath where the track abruptly makes a turn from one direction to another.

Visually, the ride should strike a bold presence, sitting in an area of the park that few would have expected to see a new coaster. With very little space in which to work, Rita’s petite form should nevertheless appear very impressive. The arrival of the youthful Queen of Speed will no doubt make the Corkscrew look even more like the frail old man of Alton Towers, and how ironic it is that the Corkscrew, once the most famous and iconic coaster in the UK, will no longer even be top of the bill in its own area. Oh the times they are a-changing.

Interestingly, there has been little word from the park as to whether Rita is intended for adrenaline junkies or family audiences. Would it be too cynical to suggest that Air taught them not to promote a ride as a thriller until they’re sure it is up to the job? Time will tell, but Alton bosses will be all too well aware that, while Rita will be the UK’s first rocket coaster, it won’t be the last, as 2006 will see Thorpe Park bidding for the Queen of Speed’s abdication, hoping to offer us the chance us to take a seat and meet a Rita beater.

W is for... Wacky Wave Swinger
Star Flyer, Hansa Park

Tis the trend of late to take mundane attractions, throw some pepper in the goulash and make something of a white knuckle feast out of it.

Hydro is a classic example.

One ride that I subconsciously thought was immune from a ‘peppering’ was the humble Wave Swinger. Of course, it wasn’t up to Zierer to mess with a design they’ve sold hundreds of over the year, but up to Austrian company, Funtime, who took the Wave Swinger format and made it a bit taller... by several hundred feet.

Your delicate rump will be orbiting the lattice-work tower in a metal seat not much larger than a bar stool at a dizzying height of about 180 feet suspended from a chain that looks weedy for anything larger than a bathplug.

Star Flyer is, amazingly, suitable for the 'unadventurous'. Picture: OnRide

Reassuringly, these chains can comfortably carry a family car, and a seatbelt and operator-controlled lapbar keeps you safely in place as your comically ornate metal seat is but a speck to those holding the bags on the ground.

The Star Flyer first appeared at the International Association of Amusement Parks and Attractions’ trade show in Florida two years ago. Since then, the first unit opened at Prata Park and Hansa Park’s ride is the second installation.

X is for... X Marks The Spot
Sky Wheel, Skyline Park

This coaster has been well documented already as it was completed in the late summer of 2004, although has yet to officially open.

Here is a handy side view of the layout:

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Despite the simplicity of the layout, it’s a hard one to describe. Try to imagine an immelman (half loop, half inline twist) joined by a dive loop (half inline twist, half loop) with the station joining the two at the bottom.

With the station at the bottom of this most basic of layouts, the two-car twelve-seater train is pulled vertically up the right hand side of our complex schematic. At the top, the train curls over, rolls through an upside-down heartline roll ending up back in the inverted position before finishing this massive inversion by dropping down the left-hand side of the circle and rocking to a halt in the station.

Sky Wheel uses Maurer’s new X-Seat which uses only lap bars to secure riders, and while the layout is currently as basic as they come, the ride has been designed to be expandable at the discretion of the park to include more freestyle elements such as cobra rolls, vertical loops and overbanked turns.

Allow me to be frank: Sky Wheel is perhaps one of the ugliest coasters I’ve ever seen. Despite being a near-circle, a beautifully elegant shape by its very nature, the lift tower on the right is an ugly latticework structure, the track at the top simply looks like a buckled mess and the colour scheme – blue and orange – really does the cause no good, either.

Y is for... You Decide! Coaster or Not?
Alpine Coaster, Fort Fun

Like other never-ending debates such as whether the glass is half empty or half full, we will never know whether or not Superman: The Escape (Six Flags Magic Mountain) is actually a coaster.

Coaster statisticians among us have long debated what actually is a coaster. Typically, the dictionary definition is often sidelined as coasters become more advanced and blur the lines of distinction, with Magic Mountain’s “ride” being the most famous example of how resolute enthusiasts get when debating the qualifications of the king of the amusement park.

The real answer is “do we really care?”, but of course the humble Bobsleigh also skirts the fine line of miscellany. With no trains and the rider controlling their speed, who knows whether or not the good people of rec.roller-coaster include this meek ride as a coaster?

Bobsleigh regulars will know that there are limitations to sledding down the side of a hill in an aluminium gutter on a plastic tea tray. You’ll first become aware of these limitations when you and your bobsleigh part company as you spectacularly crash on one of the banked corners.

The simple solution here is to substitute the drainpipe-style trough with coaster track, something that was done recently for Stoke Ski-Centre’s Alpine Coaster, and Germany’s Fort Fun will be opening their very own for 2005.

Z is for... Zamperla's Zero-Rated Volare
Trombi, Sarkanniemi 

I hate to finish off on a negative point, but blame Sarkanniemi, not me. Despite universal condemnation of any flying coaster bearing Zamperla’s name, in 2005, Sarkanniemi open Trombi, the fifth installation globally of Zamperla’s budget ‘Volare’ coaster.

To Zamperla’s credit, the coaster is a nice idea, making a costly concept inexpensive and accessible to smaller parks. The ride has a footprint that could fit on the back of a playing card, the spiral lift is a novel way to save space, and the loading is efficient and simple.

But the ride has been criticised for being overly rough with painful and unforgiving cars and a poor sensation of flying. It seems that like in the 1980s, common comfort and rider satisfaction are taking a back shelf in preference for chasing novelties.

Author: MS Tuesday, February 01, 2005 | Post a Comment
Updated: MS Monday, February 14, 2005 
Updated: MS Tuesday, March 01, 2005.